Why Am I Still Talking About Her?

... my dead child...

Sometimes I fall into the trap of what I believe other people must be thinking when reading my posts and ask myself this Q.

Today I came across this song and something in me happened.
I remembered why.
And it touched me deeply.
I actually cried just now as I was watching the 'only few' pictures we have from A'Mya.And I realised:

Grief doesn't have to be 'fresh' to be felt
Remembering matters
because it is the only time we have with them
This is the time when I mother my daughter A'Mya
The only place she lives is in my heart
and in my memory.

By sharing her with you
I keep myself sane and authentic
And if this - by any chance - triggers you
It is not because of my sharing
or because of me 'still talking about her'
It is because something in you is touched
and this feels uncomfortable 

Because truly -
you can imagine losing a child
even if you say 'I can't imagine what you went through' 
you could - if you'd so choose to -
but you'd rather not
meet that pain and anguish 
that deep inside you, you know

Because let's face it:
Loss is inevitable
Grief is a given 
you are human and bound to experience this
On the other side of birth is death
On the other side of a hello is a goodbye 
Embrace it, lean into it

Grief is Love